Pelamin anganku musnah....

Last night, I got a message from an old friend of mine. She's cute, she was my classmate during my secondary school years... And she once said to me she's single couple of months back.


Gadis Z: Assalamualaikum..

Me: Waalaikumussalam. Hai awak.

Gadis Z: ???Awak?? Cam geli je awak2. huhuh

Me: Eleh... ngan bf ko tak geli plak...huhuhu..

****long period of no reply********

Me: Uish, ko marah ke weh aku ckp td? Smpai tak reply ni..sry ah..

Gadis Z: Hahaha.... Sry ah weh... Aku tersembang ngan roommate aku....

*****Even longer period of silence*****

Gadis Z: Weh, senyap je? sry...

Me: hahaha.... Aku pon tersembang ngan rumet tadi...mrajuk kot. hahahaha

Gadis Z: Ko ngajuk...?? Huhu..Buruk ah weh.

Me: Hhahaha...Tau takpe... Naseb baik ko dok jauh. kalo tak dah nmpk dah aku guling2 meraung....wakakka...

Gadis Z:Hahaha...Ape ko merepek neh?

Me: Hahaha..Gurau jer ah... Esok weekend tak pegi mane2 ke?

Gadis Z: Weh, Ape ko ni?? Lupe ke kita ade DATE esok?

Me: Serious???? Sorryy!!! aku lupa!! Kat ne ek?

Gadis Z: Ko pilih ah tempat.

Me: Aku mana2 ok jer. Jangan One Utama atau The curve ah. Aku tak tau jalan.

Gadis Z: huhu... Dating kat padang kawat jer lah. Aku satu hari kawat esok kot. hahaha.....

Me: ...................... Sampai ati ko.............

Gadis Z: Ala....Bucuk2...jgn la ngajuk...:D

Me: Padang kawat pon padang kawat la... Janji date....

Gadis Z: Hahaha.... Jom!

Me: Esok aku nak kene jumpe someone utk satu projek nih...huhuhu...

Gadis Z: oo.. ye ke.... good luck..

Me: thx... huhuhu.... ko nak tau sumthing tak? Kalo jadi la date kite esok, tu first date ever dlm idop aku.... huhuhu...



Haish..... I should have known she was only joking.....

I felt kinda bummed, though...

My dream of not being S.A.D anymore was crushed. (Single, available and desperate)

Haish.....~

Entri hina lagi sia sia

Nak tulis dalam bahasa melayu boleh? Dah lama tak tulis. Nanti janggal pulak.

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Cuti Tahun Baru Cina.

Tahun ni, aku balik ke rumah aku di Terengganu.

"Terengganu? Bukan rumah ko kat Johor ke?" <------------ anda mungkin sedang bertanyakan soalan ini.

Dah pindah dah.

Sekali lagi.

Dari Terengganu, ke Johor Bahru, ke Batu Pahat, ke KL, ke Terengganu balik, ke Senai Johor, ke Terengganu balik.

Lepas ni nak pindah ke Utara Terengganu. Mungkin hujung tahun ni atau tahun depan.

Gila banyak aku pindah randah kan?

Lepas kahwin sah sah la pindah lagi.

Nak pindah ke Langkawi boleh? Nak sangat beli coklat asing banyak2 dan naik kereta import yg terlepas dari cukai. Mungkin Ferrari yang dibeli dengan duit lukis sendiri.

Haish...

Kalau lah dia tak kisah aku chess nerd dan masih contact dgn aku...


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Aku nak sangat update blog ni.

Dah siap susun dah secara kasar bakal entri yang baru.

Entri Jiwang.

Jiwang paling karat pernah aku tulis.

Bukan jiwang karat campur kelakar macam selalu, tapi pure jiwang karat.

Jangan gelak.

Nak sangat post.

Betul.

Tapi takut korang tak faham.

Sebabnya, bakal entri baru ni banyak kena mengena dengan Harry Potter.

Takut korang yang belum baca buku Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows (buku akhir) tak faham pucuk pangkal entri aku.

Siap ada spoiler lagi.

Kalau ada peminat Harry Potter yang belum baca lagi buku last tu baca entri aku sah2 la diorang nak tempeleng aku laju laju. Hikmat Telapak Tangan Tanpa Bayang mungkin.

Itu satu.

Satu lagi, takut aku kena bahan.

Orang Terengganu kata, "buat mmampus". Double M di situ.

Haish...

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Sebenarnya, aku tak tahu pun aku nak tulis apa. Ni sangat rawak(?). Apa aku fikir, aku tulis je. Sebab tu cam ala2 sampah sikit entri ni.

Lagipun, ilham susah nak datang kalo tengah demam 40 darjah celsius.

Harap2 turun berat badan aku barang 10 kilo. Hari tu demam seminggu turun dalam 6 kilo kot. 111kg ke 105kg.

Pastu naik balik 111kg dlm masa kurang 2 minggu lepas baik demam.

Dasar nafsu serakah.

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Cukuplah aku merepek kala pagi hari.

Kepala pun tengah pusing. Tak boleh tengok monitor lama2. Demam kot.

Selamat Tahun Baru Cina.

Gong Xi Fa Cai. Shing Hei Kwai Ler (bunyi2 lebih kurang)

Doing a friend a favor

Everyone knows Rihanna.

Everyone knows she's hot.

Everyone knows she's got the music that will make you move.

Everyone knows she'll be stopping at Malaysia for her tour on February 13 2009 at Stadium Bukit Jalil.

But what everyone knows not is that I got a friend who is trying to get rid of his two RM128 Rihanna concert tickets for just RM98 a piece.

Turns out he'll be busy that day.

If you are interested in buying the tickets, drop me an email at jackmama.mia@gmail.com.

It's not a rip off.


P/s: Word has it that tickets are selling fast. If by any chance the tickets are sold out, you know who to look for...

hehehe

My God, there are MORE??

Last year, my car had some trouble with its temperature.

Even a trip to the faculty would raise the temperature to the red level and I would have to refill the water in my radiator for every trip I took.

I guessed maybe it was because of leaking radiator, so I sent it to the workshop.

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I didn't notice it then but a couple of days back, I stumbled upon the receipt, and took another look at the services done by the repair guys.

And I was shocked to find this.





OI! WHAT KIND OF "LABOUR SERVICE" DID YOU DO TO MY RADIATOR AND WATER PUMP, HUH??

THAT IS SO SICK LA WOI!


But then, I didn't know ASSY services can solve a car's temperature problem!


My car must be gay.

DEM...........

Is there such part inside a car?

Yesterday, I went to my brother's house somewhere in KL.

Too bad that when I arrived at his house, my brother and his family went out shopping.

I was hoping to see my 2 years old nephew, but missed them by a couple of hours.

He's grown up fast.

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While at my brother's house, I saw a to-do board with this letter sent by Proton pinned to it.







I don't know there's a part named "Jack ASSY" inside a car!


The people who invented this part must be so pissed off at someone..... Maybe that part was so damn difficult to be built, so they decided to name it JACK ASSY. Coz it's a pain in the ASS.

Hopefully I don't find a part named "WATAFAK" inside any devices.

There goes my dream.

I was supposed to go to Japanese Language II this evening, but was told it was canceled.

Thank God.

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So I went walking aimlessly around the faculty, but stopped abruptly when I saw this notice.

From Slip of tongue

There goes my dream of studying overseas.


But then, I took another read, and noticed that something fishy.






WATAFAK.....?????

From what I can see, students who want to apply to this program must fulfill either two of these three criteria below.

1) Possesses CGPA of 3.70 and above,

OR

2) Must be able to mix a damn good coffee,

Or

3) Must be excellent Down Under....


I know this is my dream, but achieving it by pleasing somebody is a big no-no to me.

Obscene Korean Song...?

Last couple of month, my sis got herself a spankin new 16Gb iPod Touch.

That thing is so beautiful and so sexy that I felt like hiding it from her and never give it back.

So a couple of weeks later, she loaded some songs, podcasts, a complete season of "Everybody Loves Raymond" and I took a quick look at it.

As I was browsing that sexy thing, I came across this album.





It's My Girl Original Soundtrack from the Korean hit series, My Girl.

I used to watch that show. I loved the show, I loved the song, but I am not a fan. I don't even know the song titles.

So I flicked the album cover open.






Look at the first song.

Up till now, I still wonder how this song got through Malaysia's screening process....

Huhuhuhu.....

Foot in mouth

Shah Alam has been raining for quite a while now.

A couple of days ago, it rained so heavy, I had to stay in the faculty for a while to wait for the rain to subside a bit.

I was sitting at one of the benches in the corridor with my friend, Hafifi. On the other bench next to ours was G.G and his girlfriend.

Since they were talking so PASSIONATELY to each other, I dare not to disturb them then.

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The rain subsided.

The most beautiful rainbow appeared on the sky. From the seat I was sitting, the setting was magnificent.

The scent of fresh rain on top of leaves, with the rainbow in the sky, if that weren't romantic I don't know what is.

And then I just had to disturb them.


Me: G, meh la dok sini. Best woo.... Nampak pelangi cun gile. Romantik siot!

GG: Huhuhuhu.... Bear, org tua tua kata tak baik tunjuk jari kat pelangi. Buruk jari nanti.

Me: ..........................[speechless]

Me: [After getting over the speechlessness] Huh. G, Insaf la mu.

GG: Bakpe?

Me: Yakin la pada kuasa Allah. Allah tak turunkan bala sebab kita tunjuk jari kat pelangi. Ciptaan dia jugak tu. Bala turun bukan ditentukan atas sebab kita tunjuk jari kat pelangi. Allah sayang kat kita....


GG: Eleh. Cakap lebat! Demo solat Asar ke dok lagi nih!

Me: Tak! Huhuhuhu.

GG: Chis. Benda wajib tinggal. Ceramah lebat.

Me: Hoh. Biar ah! Mane masuk waktu lagi! Baru pukul brapa!

GG: Sekarang 5.45 petang...


DEM~

'twas A day of Christmas

Once upon a Christmas, a plastic lion was put as a decoration at Mid Valley Megamall.

The lion was magnificent. He has big muscles, huge shiny teeth and the roar that will even make a dead man scream of fear.

The lion then got so full of himself, and began bragging and disrespecting to the patrons of Mid Valley Megamall.

The lion even showed his smelly ass to a loyal visitor of Mid Valley Megamall.





Unfortunately, the visitor was so pissed off that he wasn't able to resist the urge to teach the lion a lesson or two. So, he did the unthinkable.

He molested the lion.








The lion was molested without remorse.

Being molested over and over again, the lion suffered severe depression, hypertension, hallucinations, Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, and paranoia towards incoming people from behind.

Who wouldn't?

When the guy who molested the lion was this stupid dude.





Poor lion.

He performed Hara Kiri after being unable to deal with his issues.


Moral of the story: None. This story was told coz the writer wasn't able to sleep even though he has a class at 9.30 in the morning.

New year ramblings

I've been experiencing internet deprivation for the past few days, and haven't been updating my blog. Sorry for that..

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Hopefully I'm not to late to wish you guys a happy Awal Muharram and happy new year.

Though I'm not sure what we should be happy about of the latter.

I mean, global economy sucks big time right now, and major recession is on its way to Malaysia..

Plus, George "airhead" Bush and his Zionist mates felt like celebrating new year with a "Bang", and they did so quite literally. Damned idiots.

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Will this new year be a happy year?

Will this year bear witness the day I will lose my single status?

Will this year be the year I got a Dean's List for the first time?

Will this year be the year I got so much money I can eat at Secret Recipe for a whole solid month?

Will this year be the year I make history by doing something crazy?

Hmmmm..........

Maybe...

Happy new year guys.

Photo caption contest winner

Remember about the photo caption contest I did a while ago?

Truth be told, it didn't go down very well..


The thing is, instead of submitting a funny photo caption for the picture I took, they submitted a whole new picture instead....


Photo capture and photo caption are two different things, people.....


Nonetheless, it was funny as hell. So I decided to give the prize anyway.

Sakinah submitted this photo.




If this really is the work of a six years old, the teacher really has a lot of word to do to...

Rikomaid, another reader also submitted this photo







I really had a hard time judging both of this photo.

But somebody's gotta win.

The winner is......


Rikomaid...!


Drop me an email with your home address so that I can send the prize to you, ok?


To those who didn't win, try next time ok?..

ps: To rikomaid, Please send me ur name, contact number and home address no later than 10 Januari 2009.